Relationship Success
Heather's Story: The Partner Pleaser
Finding the right relationship was Heather's greatest challenge. After 11 years on her own, with 2 short relationships in between, she attended "The Art of Attracting your Ideal Partner" workshop and began acknowledging to herself that something needed to change. That change, she knew, had to come from within by dealing with negative beliefs and feelings she had about herself. So she took the plunge and decided to embark on a course of self help that was to change her life.
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“My desperation to be loved had led to all variations of unassertive behaviour. I was willing to nurture them and do almost anything to win their approval - at the cost of sacrificing my own needs.”“Working together with my Coach and using The Journey process, I was able to clear feelings of unworthiness. As my confidence grew I continued socialising with a new freedom and a new belief - that I would find the right
relationship
and that I would be selecting the person who was worthy of me and my love!
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I learnt to ask for what I needed, to say no when I didn't have the time or inclination to do something, and to express my feelings – good and bad – without fear.” “It was an eye-opener to discover that my past pattern of repeatedly attracting the same type of person had not simply been my bad luck – that belief was simply keeping me in victim mode. The truth was that I had made the choice about the kind of person I was willing to accept!” Instead of opening her heart too quickly and being eager to please, as she had done in the past, Heather’s new awareness made her cautious. With her new insight into herself, as well as awareness of her old behaviours, she started dating, all the while ‘practising’ her new assertive behaviours. Several friendships followed before she a found the love that would finally be hers, allowing the courtship to take place at a manageable pace.
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